Friday, August 9, 2013

This and That Friday...and Colin Firth

- Four Retirees Visit A Bar -

Four old retired men are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona.  They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents."

They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true.

The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you!

What'll it be, gentlemen?"

There's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a martini.

In no time the bartender serves up four iced martinis shaken, not stirred and says, "That's 10 cents each, please."

The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other.  They can't believe their good luck.  They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.

Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the bartender again saying,"That's 40 cents, please."

They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them.  They've each had two martinis and haven't even spent a dollar yet.

Finally one of them says, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"

"I'm a retired tailor from Phoenix ," the bartender says, "and I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the Lottery Jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this place.  Every drink costs a dime.  Wine, liquor, beer it's all the same."

"Wow!  That's some story!" one of the men says.

As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can't help noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don't have any drinks in front of them and haven't ordered anything the whole time they've been there.

Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the Bartender, "What's with them?"

The bartender says, "They're retired people from Florida.  They're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price, plus they all have coupons..."

(You have to be a Floridian to understand this on a deeper level.  Or senile.  Oops, same thing)

And now for my Happy Time Video of the Day - It will make you smile....


Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Our bad boy - our Alfie (and Richard Armitage)

He is known by many names.
Alfred...  Alfie...  Fredo the stupid older brother of Michael Corleone...  That Damn Dog...  The Polish Prince...  

My Darling Boy.

I don't know what to do with him.  Tonight he pushed his way under the chain link fence around our yard and was running up and down outside the length of the fence, having the time of his life.  Now what do we do?  I can't let him out in the yard on his own anymore; what if he bites someone?  I don't think he'd ever do that but who knows when a dog is frightened, what they might do?  And he looks so ferocious too.

He has separation anxiety when we we don't leave the house anymore.  Every time we do he eats something.  He's eaten a chair cushion, the vertical blinds, my cell phone, a book, three shavers and one shoe.

And yet...he is the most needy dog I've ever had.  He's hungry for affection all the time, drops everything when you yell at him, sits politely and looks up at you with those eyes of his!

And he loves our older dog, Darcy.  He idolizes her.

We thought he was a Pit Bull mix, but now we aren't certain.  He's such a wuss, how could he be Pit Bull too?  And he's so lovable.  And clumsy.  You don't know true fear until you see an 80 pound dog running at you full speed, with love in his eyes.  Yikes.

Oh, well.  He's here to stay.  No matter how angry my husband gets with him, I insist "If he goes, I go."  (interesting aside, you have to be really secure to say something like that, I wouldn't recommend it for most wives.)